Top 35 Lessons from 35 Years of Life

i got a call at 2 am the night i turned 30.  my partner was throwing all my things out on our lawn. again.  the worst part is i wasn’t shocked. i’d told our roommate to expect it and to give me a call if anything happened.

thankfully, it was the last time i took this sort of abusive behavior. i packed what things i could and never went back.

READ: 5 Signs It’s Time to Walk Away

five years later, birthdays are hard to celebrate. i suffered the loss of a relationship and my home all on the most special day of the year. plus, as a black woman, i’m not always the best at celebrating myself.  on my 35th birthday, i decided it was time for a change.

i booked a facial, had not one, but TWO parties, spoke at a conference and overall did boss shit. unlike 30, i made 35 my own. it’s a sign that i’ve claimed my healing.

shot out to a bomb therapist, acupuncturist and sister’s circle for supporting my work to heal. aside from their support, i made it my mission to create a new narrative about life.

top 35 lessons from 35 years of life:

1. i am the radical embodiment of love.
2. i’ve made no mistake that matters today.
3. i deserve forgiveness.
4. i am becoming, blooming and blessed.
5.  an ounce of gratitude will manifest a mountain of wealth.
6. do more of what you love.
7. whatever, however and whoever i am is more than enough.
8. i love myself.
9. i am a vessel for god’s work on earth.
10. i know god is real.
11. blessings flow infinitely.
12. high vibrations attract high vibrations.
13. set your intention and give it all your attention.
14. beauty cannot be diminished or minimized. it can only be magnified.
15. everything will be ok in the end. if it’s not okay, then it’s not the end.
16. i am the hope and dream of the enslaved.
17. be gentle with yourself.
18. self-care is revolutionary.
19. some things aren’t meant to be kept.
20. more flow, less resistance.
21. there’s no prototype for the person you were made to become.
22. allow abundance to manifest.
23. no one said it would be easy. no one said you couldn’t overcome.
24. where’s your crown? wear your crown.
25. mistakes make miracles.
26. fear is a liar.
27. learn something new everyday.
28. i can do anything that is well and good.
29. embrace the unknown.
30. roadblocks are challenges to rise above, not barriers to opportunities.
31. keep praying, you’re blessing’s on its way.
32. someone, somewhere is waiting on you to heal.
33. stop fearing your greatness.
34. trust the vision that god has given you.
35. just breathe.

overall, these beliefs got me through the toughest times. some i’ve mastered, others are still guiding my journey. i encourage you to write them on sticky notes, notebooks, billboards — whatever it takes to surround yourself with love. be well.